for all the ladies out there.

Thursday, September 22, 2011

please tell me you are just as obsessed with meg fee as i am.

and please tell me i'm not the only one who read this post. and who more importantly kept thinking, "yes, yes, yes." 

and not enthusiastic "yes's" mind you, but a "yes" that simply took over me. someone had just perfectly captured my thoughts and had written them down.

they were her words, but yet they were mine.

now, with this blog comes the challenge of choosing and deciding how much of your life you should share on it (or more like, how much you want to share).

but, if meg hadn't written her words and feelings down (ugh..."feelings." why do i cringe at the word), i wouldn't of had an "aha" moment. 

so here i go.

and with baby steps, i quote the wise woman herself--

"as a girl i fear.
as a woman i doubt.

i am insecure. i second-guess. i worry and wonder and spin tall-tales, fabricate nonsense, pull from from thin-air. i make myself small, diminish my own worth and power. i relive memory after memory until they are worn dull from overuse, from being taken out too often, exposed to the air and error of misremembering.

and then i think that perhaps what makes me a woman is the co-existance of all these things with a deep-seated sense of how i could, given the chance, transform the world--so potent and reaching is my strength."

do you know what i mean? what she means?

sometimes it lasts a moment, a day, or weeks.

but no matter which, these words of meg's were the most powerful:

"enough of this nonsense. the next time you begin to worry. the next time doubt creeps in you must remember this moment, this moment right now. you must look at what's happening before you--to you as evidence. that's what you want, right? tangible evidence? well, there it is. that is my gift to you.  so stop. enough. be better."

so stop. 
be better.

although, meg is not of my faith, i want to believe (i hope) that with that desire to be better. the desire to say "hey knock it off. you are awesome" (which i find saying to myself). that she knows, that we all know, that thankfully when as silly girls we doubt, have fears, and don't think we are perfect...

(which we are not--let's face it)

that we remember this:

"fear not, for i am with thee" (gen. 26:24)

and more than that, remember that we are beautiful (and i repeat--beautiful) daughters of our heavenly father. a daughter of a king. 

that statement right there, tells me again:

so stop. 
be better.

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